Happy Tell-a-Joke Day. Today the joke is on overly serious cartographers.

Please do let me know if you find anything inaccurate or of professionally negligent about this map.

To steal a line from Richard D. James (a.k.a., Aphex Twin): … I care because you do. 😉

View Map Here

Web Mapper GPT Initial Prompt

Hi. Sunday is National Make a Joke Day.

American cartographers are serious. Like… way too serious about maps. They think they are really, really important. And they can be, but most maps are not. In fact, the importance of a map is directly relatable only to the utility it has for anyone at a given time, I would argue. And that’s no joke.

So for this day, the joke will be the map itself. The rhetorical argument we will be making with this map is that maps are a joke. They all lie. They all distort. They all make arguments. And today, on National Make a Joke Day, this map is going to be perfect, because it is a joke. And American cartographers need to chill out, because maps really don’t matter in the grand scheme of things compared to almost anything else.

Please create a map of the US as unnecessarily distorted and haphazard as possible. Perhaps resize the states in inverse order of their actual populations and move them around so they aren’t where they are supposed to be.

Rename the states after famous comedians or pop stars that were born in those states (e.g., Minnesota, which may now be down where California used to be, randomly, and resized quite large given it’s relatively small population, might be named Dylanville (after Bob Dylan) or after a famous comedian who lived there… though, none come to mind.)

For each state, when you hover over or click on it, provide a unique joke that pokes fun or deals with that state. Not too insulting but something based on truth. Each state needs a unique joke. The joke doesn’t have to be cartographic at all, but it should deal with that given state.

Dumb jokes are fine. A little cutting is fine. No jokes based on poverty, race, discrimination, or anything else potentially inflammatory.

Give the map a title something like… “The joke’s on you…” Subtitle: National Make a Joke Day, August 16, 2026.

Put the title across the bottom of the map. Everything above the fold, though. On mobile, keep the title fixed to the bottom.

Include a hamburger icon. When clicked, show a sources modal that says (please rephrase to be a bit kinder and wittier):

“American cartographers need to lighten up. This map is meant to help those who think every generalization decision and every map inaccuracy is fraught with peril realize that nobody is going to die from half-assed maps. And no one outside of online echo chambers cares how inaccurate or unfunny this map is. Loosen up a little. It’ll be really good for you and society at large.”

Explain how each state is sized and arranged. Make a funny remark somewhat akin to: “Please let us know if you think of any way to improve the accuracy or the validity of this map. We care because you do…”

Made for the [#365DaysOfMaps campaign]\([https://mapdesign.icaci.org](https://mapdesign.icaci.org)) of the Map Design Commission for the ICA.

The map should be interactive. Please export as a zip package. Thanks!

I’ve been doing a lot of diaphragmatic breathing in recent weeks. I won’t go into details, but it turns out that to fight through any kind of non-acute pain, all you need to do is get up, keep your schedule, and breathe diaphragmatically.

I’m not making this up. I’ve learned this from specialists at the world-renowned Mayo Clinic, and I’ve been testing it when I can’t sleep in recent weeks. By jove, it’s true! Next time you can’t sleep, if you breathe diaphragmatically (or belly breathe) for at least 10-15 minutes, you will fall asleep. It’s pretty neat!

So when I saw this day on the calendar, I got quite excited.

I was thinking… heck, I can share what I’ve learned with others.

If you are stressed about life, can’t stand imperfect maps (note: you will want to learn how to breathe diaphragmatically before tomorrow for sure), AI eliminating your job, prompt cartography, the weather, or upper-management’s decision-making, you can just do what today’s “map” shows you how to do and your migraines, canker sores, phantom back pains, and stress rashes will disappear. No need for a chiropractor, pain meds, or calling that 1-800 number you saw on late-night television with the overly friendly supplement salesperson.

So take a deep breath and learn how to breathe diaphragmatically. Today’s map, or chart of the air ways and vagus nerve, will be a start. It takes practice, but you’ll get there.

View Map Here

ChatGPT / Web Mapper GPT Prompt

For national relaxation day, I would love to create a little interactive visualization (and kind of game, but not really) displaying how diaphragmatic breathing can help relax the central nervous system via the Vegas Nerve. A somewhat minimalist web interface would be needed, that shows a human body outline with the diaphram and lungs reprented, as well as the vegas nerve. The user should be able to pick if tehy are male or female at the start. The outline figure will have stereotypical boy or girl hair and a a smiley face when the app starts after the user selects their gender on the main page.

Then, a cacophony of horn beeps and news quips, etc., just noise will start playing. There will be a little heart-beat monitor that starts beating fast and faster… and a largish button that just says “Breathe In”.

When the user presses it, a simple but professional animation will show air entering the lungs, and the person’s belly and rib cage will expand slightly, as long as the button is held down. Then, after no more than six seconds (if they are still holding the button… The button will switch to say “Breathe Out” and automatically, the person’s breathe will release slowly and the rib cage and belly receded back to the original size. The outside world’s noises will have quieted during the breathing in and stay quiet as the person is breathing out. After a brief pause, the noise and commotion sounds will increase again, and the person’s heart rate will tick upward until the user hit breathe in…

Diaphragmatic breathing… Somewhere on the website have an “What is diaphragmatic breathing?” button for the user to click. When clicked, show a description of diaphragmatic breathing and list all of its known benefits. Please cite studies or the Mayo Clinic website when writing this, but use your own language. Write it for middle- and high-schoolers.

Explain the Symptomatic (fight, flight, freeze) and asymptomitic [sic, please correct] states (relax and digest) and explain how breathing can get you out of the fight, flight, and freeze mode.

Make it informative. Please include some useful iconic graphics that explain the Vegas nerve, etc. Make it approachable for middle-school kids and older.

The site should look professional. Similar to a Mayo Clinic information website (font, colors, etc.). Ideally this web page becomes a gateway for teachers and medical professionals to introduce teens to diaphragmatic breathing. Thanks!

A couple of years ago my daughter asked me if we’re poor as we were passed by a bunch of classmates and their parents in their gorgeous, newish, super-sleek SUVs, while we trundled out of the school parking lot in our 12-year old, beat-up, dinged compact hatchback largely held together via duct tape and strategically placed Amazon bubble wrap.

I thought it was interesting that the quality of one’s car possession was equated in her mind to having money or wealth. Because as anyone who keeps tabs on US car loan and lease defaults knows, it clearly is not. In fact, having a nice new car, much less two or more, in an American household is perhaps better associated with massive, largely avoidable household debt. Not always, mind you, but quite frequently.

Every nice car has an opportunity cost: cars depreciate quickly and irrevocably. What could the money being spent on down- and monthly-payments have been invested in or spent on otherwise? Would it have increased family wealth?

These are the things that go through my mind every time I’m tempted to upgrade my car to an electric vehicle or pickup truck. The whole point of a vehicle is to get me from Point A to Point B. Since I travel about 10-15 miles total a week, mostly to swim practices, there is no logical justification for buying a new car, regardless that it’s quite embarrassing to be that car that no one else wants to park next to, because well… it’s a banger!

And these thoughts of mine coincide with today’s theme of US National Financial Awareness.

Americans, by and large, are not particularly savvy when it comes to finances or spending. This isn’t meant pejoratively; it’s beared out in numbers across almost all geographic scales.

So for the first time in a while, I’m actually pumped about one of the national days. I think it may have merit – unlike GIS Day, which I personally think is silly, but I know many, many people love for some reason – and they spend lots of money on GIS-promotion t-shirts that they could instead invest in retirement, but I digress and I’m mangling my days up…

In the US, most people can be accused of trying to keep up with the Joneses from time-to-time. Case in point: wanting to be able to say I had a PS5 to my friend who had one already was one of the foolish reasons I dropped money on a… Playstation 5. The PS4 was plenty good. And now the PS5 collects dust in the corner. But… okay, honestly, playing Star Wars Battlefront 2 may have been worth it. 😉

But affluence isn’t measured in financed (or dusty and paid-for) possessions. It’s measured in household wealth, income, and… (debt).

A lot of Americans driving nice cars and with PS5s and big houses are actually living paycheck-to-paycheck. (This likely at least partially explains the absolute terror of the white-collar workforce about AI rapidly diminishing their roles and salaries.) I just read that many Americans are (again) refinancing their mortgages this year to pay off their other debts – and presumably, lease newer cars? Most Americans (probably) don’t own their homes or cars outright, but actually, owe a lot of money on them. And this is really sad to me; because…

If my daughter’s first inclination is any indication, the cycle of debt is self-perpetuating and self-manifesting. Buy beyond your means to look like you’re living the American Dream; fall into (avoidable) debt; then work frantically and non-stop to buy (and often finance) more things to keep roleplaying the American Dream. The dream itself is a nightmare America doesn’t seem capable of waking up from.

Now surely, there are quite a few people (including many reading this blog) that can afford nice cars. (Hell, I have saved enough driving my current trashcan on wheels that I could afford one myself. But spending money on cars doesn’t make sense when there are new power tools and board games that I could instead purchase!) And many successful Americans are affluent. Likewise, many Americans cannot even afford a crappy hatchback. (Money best not spent, likely, as cars are money pits.) But my point is that the appearance of wealth and having money are two very different things. America has been appearing wealthy while bankrupting itself at the national and nuclear-family scale for decades. And it’s hard not to believe that this fact isn’t going to come home to roost soon.

This also goes for the stock market, which is due for a monumental crash in the relatively near future. (First of all: the market is cyclical, so crashes are inevitable. Second of all, AI investments are a bubble. They check every box of a Ponzi Scheme right now. Ponzi schemes are stellar if you get in early and out before the implosion; so get out while the money is good, I advise. Though, I only own a crappy hatchback, so take anything I say regarding investments with a grain of salt compared to your financial advisor in a Lexus.)

So many “wealthy” Americans right now feel wealthy because the S&P 500 keeps going up – never-ending gains. But when it crashes 50% or so in the next year or two, they will literally have 50% of what they thought they had. And given Americans tend to live on perceived wealth, not actual money under the mattress, this won’t be good. Because money in one’s Fidelity account is not real money when it is invested in index funds. It’s ether. It’s a mental stimulus. Stocks, mutual funds, and bonds are not wealth until you cash them out. So even a great 401(k) is illusionary. When (not if) everyone tries to sell at once, well… you know… it’s not worth anything. Same with your unpaid-for house and… well, cars are worth less and less everyday without any outside intervention. The good news? In Minnesota, at least, registration gets cheaper and cheaper every year – the hatchback only cost me $30 for tabs this year!

Anyway, these are all the things swirling in my head as I asked the Spatial Data Creator and Web Mapper GPT tools to help me create a map for Financial Awareness Day.

I decided to map debt by county. Different kinds of debt, naturally. Credit card, auto, and student loan debt, as well as medical debt – though, the latter dataset has a lot of null or missing data, unfortunately. Overall debt levels by household in different counties are included too.

The prognosis: the US is kind of as poor as I imagined. Not evenly. Not everywhere. But pretending you’re living the American Dream is expensive. And the real dream doesn’t seem particularly attainable.

Add to this the US government’s incredible financial debt – with interest payments now passing its total defense spending – and there isn’t much light at the end of the tunnel. There aren’t that many people left to tax to pay the debt off… And taxing the rich won’t cut it either, since it won’t make much of a dent in our trillion dollar interest payments.

It’s a pickle. All I can do is drive my hatchback into the ground and tell my kids not to be fooled by appearances. Save your money. Avoid the American Dream. Invest wisely. Don’t get greedy. Cash out before bubbles pop. Spend money on things that give your life value, meaning, and perhaps, help you earn more income (e.g., a new Mac for making prompt-based maps may be a better investment than new rims; a $20/month subscription to ChatGPT a better investment than Netflix; a new chain saw to cut down trees to provide your home with affordable heating… that last one is directly Minnesota related, I suppose).

Hopefully this map scares some people straight. For others, I hope it adds some nuance to the dire situation of debt across the US. No matter what, I hope you find it interesting to explore. (I asked Web Mapper to add some interactive charts to make it a bit more fun. Hey, even if the news is almost all bad, at least you can have fun. What’s more American than that?)

Have an awesome Financial Awareness Day!

View Map Here

Web Mapper GPT Prompt 

Hi, I would like to create a dataset to celebrate Financial Awareness Day. Are tehre any good datasets out there that show average household income debt by county, or average household retirement savings, etc.?

If not, are there any US national datasets showing average state or county-level debt – via bonds, etc.? That may be even more interesting?

Please do some research and scour the internet and report back what you find about such datasets. I am not willing to pay for them, but I can set up a free API account to access them if that is requried. No problem.

Thank you!

Spatial Data Maker GPT Prompt

Please analyze the attached dataset of every county in the US and its various debt rates.

Create a US county map that a map user can zoom in on, explore, and examine, using different visualization, classifications, and chart techniques, please, showing US national debt county by county. Please allow for state zooms, county lookup, a static info box for specific counties, the ability to show or hide chart panels that are interactive and cross-filter with the map. Allow multi-select on the charts where it makes sense. Give the map a name related to a potential paucity of US Financial Awareness given debt across the US. Allow the user to switch between viewing a map and data of total debt, financial aid, auto, and medical (where medical exists).

I am attaching a Dashboard template. Please follow it as well as possible but you may diverge where it makes sense?

I just realized how high today’s number is… 225 days?! It’s hard to believe we’ve been doing this map-a-day thing so long. I’m actually worried about what might happen when the year ends. I may end up grieving or something. Or perhaps I’ll revisit some of these daily maps and do them justice, I suppose. But enough thinking about the future; I have spent the last two weeks getting educated about mindfulness. So I will focus on the task at hand, which is…

Celebrating International Left-Handers Day!

What a day! It’s wonderful. I woke up this morning, and thought: I wonder what it’s like to be left-handed. So I tried to do everything with my left hand instead of my dominant right. And it went about as well as you’d suspect. It didn’t take too long of me banging about for my daughter, who is left-handed, to ask: “What the hell is wrong with you this morning?!”

I informed her that I was practicing solidarity with her. She essentially told me to piss off and stop making so much noise – in a much nicer and more subtle way.

I’ve always loved the fact that we have a single lefty in our family – no one else is left-handed on her mom’s or dad’s side either… she is a dexterous enigma. Where did these (recessive?) genes come from? Or how did her brain wire itself to prefer her left hand? (If so, it must have been very early on, as we noticed that she was going to be a lefty almost straight away. Every doctor, relative, and friend told us that you can’t tell until “age two”, but we were calling it around six months. It was obvious then, no matter what the experts say.)

Alas, “south paws” tend to go on and do fairly well in life. I mean, presumably a lot of them become na’er-do-wells and mess up their lives like right-handed people too, but if you want to become President of the United States, being left-handed seems to increase your odds. (Though, there could be an argument that being President doesn’t exclude you from being a na’er-do-well, I suppose.) And Rocky Balboa was a lefty – his license plate in Rocky IV was “South Paw”!

For those of you upset with term “South Paw”, I don’t really apologize. It isn’t a derogatory term at all, but a term of endearment coming from early 1900s baseball – I’ve been told. You see, baseball fields, at least the professional ones, are typically aligned so that home plate is west, the pitcher’s mound and outfield east. Left-handed pitchers – which are rarer and more difficult to hit for many batters – were therefore referred to as “south paws”, because their throwing hand was to the south. (At least, that’s what a baseball aficionado from Penn State once told me back in 2001 while attending a Pirates baseball game, so I’m just taking it as gospel to my grave, and if it is incorrect, spreading misinformation. Isn’t the first and won’t be the last time… I’m at peace with it. Lots of diaphragmatic breathing going on in this household these days.)

Alas… here is today’s map. I love my daughter, and I want left-handed people of the world to unite and usurp the hegemony of right-handed people like myself. The map is meant to inspire lefties to rise up… I guess.

One thing I will note: not all countries have equal reliability scores. This is noted on the map, and each country is given its own reliability score, but don’t forget that. I lived in Hungary for nearly three years. I never noticed more than one out of four people being lefties, and I played a lot of pool/billiards there too. (Though, in a weird twist of fate, I shoot pool left-handed, because i was taught to play by my childhood friend who was left-handed, and it came to feel normal. There’s probably a reason I really suck at pool to this day – I shoot with the wrong hand and I can’t see 3D… yeah, meet me at the billiards hall to make easy money!)

View Map Here

Spatial Data Maker GPT Prompt

Web Mapper GPT Prompt

Can you please design a simple, interactive map showing differences between left-and-right handedness, country by country. An information window should show useful information about each country when selected. Use an appropriate visualization technique and the attached style map.

Equal earth projection, please. Emphasis should be on Left-handedness. Which countries have more. The more the better, because this is to celebrate “Left-handed Day.” Pretend that left-handedness is a very valuable commodity – Soviet style! 🙂

Thanks! Please make sure the mobile-phone version works in portrait mode and that the info window is minimizable and opens from the bottom. Design the desktop app stylistically. Above the fold design no matter what, though. It should fit int he window. Thank you! 🙂

Ken already made a map for No Pants Day. It was epic! I decided to have a go at National Underwear Day.

I loath rainbow choropleth schemes. But in a week where I have been trying to leave my comfort zone, I’ve decided to go all out and embrace a rainbow-esque color scheme for a noble cause… nostalgia.

It’s not ROYGBIV; it may even be more heinous. And the default view is certifiably not color-blind friendly. (Though in the top header there is a button you can click to change it to a color-blind friendly version.)

Cartographic innovation is about breaking rules. In this case, I was trying to relive those incredibly saturated weather maps on the back page of the front section of the USA Today print newspaper which could be found every morning outside one’s door in nearly every US hotel chain throughout the 1980s and 1990s.

1980s newspaper colors were BRIGHT!

They were anything but nuanced. In hindsight, I fondly recall them as an analog precursor those dreadful 1990s “web-safe” color palettes. Using them breaks every contemporary cartographic rule there is, which is what made this map fun to create.

So the map’s color scheme and block-like design is nothing to envy, but it’s spot on for what I asked for. I used the 1980s color newspaper schema I created and shared in the Map Design Lab on promptcartography.com.

I asked it to design the map like a section of one of those 1980s newspapers – boxy, gaudy, and with 1980s print colors. And then I gave it a dataset that fit the theme perfectly – a county-by-county underwear drying index for August 5 (National Underwear Day) across the US.

The Underwear Drying Index (trademark pending… 😉 is real. It is a concoction of real weather data, created using my favorite Web Mapper Suite – Spatial Data Maker GPT (full conversation and datasets available here). You can view the dataset provenance here.

Happy National Underwear Day! For those outside the US… I know you are missing out. Feel free to refashion this index to suit your national underwear or clothes-drying days. It’s gratis! 😉 Please just CC – BY NY (and maybe B.O.?) – Map Design Commission of the ICA, 2026.

1980s Color-Newspaper Design Aesthetic (Original Intent)

Colorblind-friendly toggle in the header.

View Map Here

Web Mapper GPT Prompt

Hi. I need to come up with some tasteful map ideas for Underwear Day on August 5th. Can you help me brainstorm up to 4 different map ideas – from data-oriented to absurd and artistic image maps?

I’ve had several cartography students who were in the US Coast Guard. And my daughter’s friend from HOSA joined the Coast Guard this summer.

Since the alternative map theme available today was National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day, and since this week began with propaganda maps and has already included a US nuclear submarine map, I figured why not pay homage to the US Coast Guard. So…

Happy US National Coast Guard Day!

P.S. This map is not endorsed, promoted, or recognized by the US National Coast Guard and no trademarked symbology was used in its creation. It is for education purposes only to celebrate US Coast Guard Day. That being said, the color scheme and mobile-friendly D3 globe is pretty awesome in my opinion. 😉

View Map Here

Web Mapper GPT Prompt

Hi, please create a map to celebrate August 4, US National Coast Guard Day. If possible, please use an interactive globe projection – orthographic but spinnable and pannable – centered on the coterminous United States with both the Pacific and Atlantic seaboards easily visible, as well as the Gulf of Mexico.

Differentiate the different types of points in the dataset. Allow users to click a point to have an information window (fixed location in corner of window) appear with information about the Coast Guard base or incident, please. Minimize the reliability score, but have it available in the lower area of the info window for each feature.

Style the map using similar color schemes and typefaces as to those found on official US Coast Guard website(s), with attribution and not copying exactly. Do not copy exactly or imply that this map is endorsed by the US Coast Guard, because it is not.

DO NOT show a blue rectangle around selected locations, etc. Alsok please add “Creator: (Ian Muehlenhaus)[https://www.muehlenhaus.com] to the about modal. Also please include a thank you in the about, from Ian, to all those who have served in the US Coast Guard, because I like the Coast Guard. Thanks.

Emphasize the datasets in the visual hieararchy. I have a Mapbox API key if it is needed and makes sense to use a Mapbox globe. However, an ArcScene is acceptable if it works as well. Whatever gets us a panscalar, good looking global basemap interface.

—

IMPORTANT: on mobile, have the info window panel come up from the bottom, fit within the width of the browser window, and be easily minimizable/maximizable by clicking anywhere on the header bar of it.

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I’ve attached two datasets that are exactly the same, just different formats. Use the one that is easiest for you to use.

Thank you!

On this day in 1958, the USS Nautilus – the first nuclear-powered submarine in the world – reach the North Pole on a top-secret mission.

Millions of Americans who still believed in Santa Claus would later learn the truth – Santa does not really live at the North Pole. (Though absence of proof does not constitute proof of absence in science, fortunately; so there is still a chance for true Santa Claus believers out there.)

I normally don’t do historical event anniversaries, but August 3rd turns out to be the first day I have come across that has fewer than four or five commemorative things pegged to it. I was very tempted to create a “Grab some nuts” day map, but my family thankfully talked me out of it after I shared my ideas formed from watching oodles of baseball games since the World Cup ended. I was desperate for something… and then I found it… the USS Nautilus. The North Pole. What’s not to love. Boring historical map done. While stopping to get some guess on a road trip, I verbally asked Spatial Data Maker GPT on my phone to find or create a dataset of the journey. When we arrived that was done. While waiting in line at the hotel, I asked Web Mapper GPT to create a map with a stereographic projection and using a 1990s World War II map design style to map the route and to also try to include images at each “milestone” of the voyage.

By the time I checked into the room, it was ready. Uploaded to the server.

Now, I’m watching an episode of “To Catch a Smuggler” – an episode I’ve seen before, but it never gets old watching canines sniffing mail – and writing this. Given how easy it is to make a map at this point, it’s neat to reflect on just how far ChatGPT has come since January 1st…

But not too long. I have to figure out what to map for August 4. I suppose that’s something I can worry about tomorrow night while in line at the grocery store.

View Map Here

Web Mapper GPT Prompt

Hi there. Tomorrow is the anniversary of the USS Nautilus submarine going under the North Pole or something like that. Could you please create a map commemorating this feat?

Ideally it should be a stereographic or gnomonic projection centered on the North Pole. If possible, please find or use vector bathymetry. Land area can have country boundaries lightly marked, but the land should be ground, bathymetry of the oceans next up in the visual hierarchy, and the route and milestones dominant. Graticules would be okay, but these should be very light and easily overlooked. Label the meridians outside of the circle neatline of the map.

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